Sleep

Why I’m smiling right now? Because I sacrificed something called sleep and it went on for so long that I forgot about it, and I’m living under the false notion that my life is ok. This is not ok, and one day I need it to stop. I asked for help when I realised what they were doing to me, and I never saw them again. Then, after a while, they came up after realizing that I was doing ok. The damage has been already done, if they had helped me at that time, I wouldn’t be this frozen. It was hard waking up for me, every morning, coaching myself to get back upon my feet, because I had no one when I needed the support the most, to get my thoughts straight.

Now, I remember that’s how I died. That’s when I stopped showing emotions. I wasn’t talking about just a day, still I don’t feel anything when I’m talking about the damage, that’s how deep it is. If it was someone else, either this would have been a haunted home or living upstairs by then. But I wasn’t asking help type, I never asked help from anyone in my life and when I finally asked for help the first time that really mattered to me, they weren’t there. I wasn’t the running type either, I played the waiting game, and finally I figured out a way to beat my odds and removed the one vulnerability that’s causing all my troubles.

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